THE PURPLE-FLAVOURED PUNK

So, first of all. Tell us about yourself, Cheesy!	Well, y'know, I'm Cheesy Chips! I'm the frontman of my band, STIFF. I'm 25 years young, 'n' younger at heart. Not too young, though, hah!
I love that! Where did you grow up?	Well, kinda in the middle of nowhere in Coerthas. Even now, it's kinda borin' goin up there on tours. Too cold, right? Even Beetle doesn't like going up there with me!
Beetle?	Hell yeah, Beetle Picnic! Love my tiny ****in' wife to bits.
Language!	Ah, what the **** ever.
(Cheesy left for a cigarette and returned 5 minutes later.)
So! Your wife , she must miss you back home when you're touring.	First of all, her pronouns are they/them. And... I mean, I imagine they do! They ain't goin' lonely, though. We have an arrangement, y'know? Keeps us both well maintained.
Cheesy, stop doing that with your eyebrows.

So, where do you usually hang out?	Well, Ul'dah has gotta be up there, right? Usually pretty good vibes there, plus it's a good place for buskin' when the tour funds are running low.
How do your funds run low?	I dunno, how do yours? Buying copious amounts of alcohol, food and tipping waitresses, obviously.
... Sure, Chips. So, where'd the name 'Cheesy Chips' come from?	Well, y'know, it's not my real name. That ain't for you to know, though. But, all the best musicians have fake names, right? So, I tried to think of somethin' everybody likes, so it'd mean more people wanna come to my shows. And I'm pretty sure everyone likes cheesy chips, right?
They sure do.

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